I've been making myself write these little ditties more and more, but I never know if they're going to be a part of something bigger or just stand alone, so I just dug this one up.

I'm reading the dictionary. Not a pocket size or college edition either. The 22nd edition of Websters which I got as a Christmas present as a teen. I haven't gotten really far, there is no plot, it's filled with big words but they're usually defined anyway, and it's hard to keep up with the thousands of characters.

I read it to understand words better in general because we use words all the time the definitions of which we may not entirely know, and I read it to increase my vocabulary, but as with ANYTHING I do a story tends to creep out whether I like it or not. I've only gotten one story so far from reading the dictionary, and it's just a bit of dialogue between two people, but I always laugh when I read it.

Fun with Vocabulary: Abacinate

by
Fred L. Taulbee Jr.

What?

I said I’m going to abacinate the witch.

Why?

Because she’s a witch.

No. Why do you say abacinate?

It means to blind someone by placing a red-hot copper basin close to the eyes.

I figured that’s what it meant, but why don’t you just say I’m going to burn her eyes out? It sounds much more frightening then.
I don’t know. It just sounded good. I looked it up and everything.

Oh, I’m sorry. Go ahead and abacinate the witch then.

Okay. Thank you.